what i do with my daughter is read her a bedtime story, then leave the lamp on next to her bed and leave her with a book. she'll read quietly to herself for about 5 mins then lies down and goes to sleep. we don't have a stair gate on, i close her bedroom door initially then about half an hour later i open it again and she stays put. there are nights when she gets up and climbs into my bed, but she doesn't really wake me up (i am aware she's there but i'm not having to get out of bed, and she's not getting upset)
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